Ask the Answer B!tch

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So Sienna Miller stands around topless on a boat and a hotel balcony, and she gets to sue the British tabs who published the photos? How does that work? Wasn't she visible for the world to see?
—Peter, St. Paul

She was.

In the States, if starlets stood on boats—clearly visible to the mortified public, wearing nothing but their egos—we'd probably get to sue them, for traumatizing us with their concave boobies and horrifically jutting collarbones.

But not so in Britain. This week, Sienna Miller filed a suit in her home country, claiming two tabloids invaded her privacy by publishing topless photos of her and boyfriend Balthazar Getty on vacation in Italy. See the incredible reason why Miller just might win—and what Naomi Campbell has to do with all of this—after the jump.

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Stephen Vaughan/Warner Bros. Entertainment

About how much does it cost to make a movie like Batman?
—Becca

First of all, it's The Dark Knight. Batman is a happy dasher in tights. The Dark Knight is bleak and angry and brooding and may or may not have beaten up his mom for the sake of a better Gotham. And the answer is about $180 million.

Shall we continue with your Burning Q's? Flash that B!tch Signal!

The last news we got of Patrick Swayze's health was in May. Please follow up on his health condition.
—J.M.

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John Sciulli/WireImage.com

I read that Sherri Shepherd, who once wondered out loud if the world was flat, has had a ton of abortions. Why do stars share all this? TMI!
—Micki, New Jersey

Shepherd was spilling to a Christian women's magazine. You can't appear in one of those without sharing your life-affirming account of Jesus lifting you from the ashes. Shepherd's involved abusive relationships and, she says, "more abortions than I would like to count."

And, oh: The revelation certainly hasn't hurt the woman's profile, has it?

"Of all the people on The View, nobody pays attention to her," notes celebrity therapist Gilda Carle. "We know that Whoopi and Joy are outspoken, and we know all about crying Elizabeth. But now Sherri wants people to pay attention to her."

Now you pay attention to me, as I answer more of your Burning Q's!

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Starbux / WENN

Why are so many celebutantes/reality stars recording albums? Who the heck is telling them that's a good idea?
—Penny, Denver

Now, now. I hear the manatees living off the coast of Florida cannot get enough of Scarlett Johansson's album. They line up along Cape Canaveral and thump their stumpy flippers and take turns mooing just like ScarJo does on "Fannin Street."

If you need to blame someone for this recent spate of craptastic singer-actress albums, blame the cheap-ass music industry. More on exactly how cheap-assness has resulted in a Hayden Panettiere album after the jump.

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truTV

I'm bored with Lindsay, Heidi and Batman, Answer B!tch! Gimme something new to obsess about!
—Guy, Norwalk

Obsess, sure. Here are 10 juicy things you can latch onto and blog about until Mom calls you to dinner.

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FAME PICTURES

What's with all these celebrity toddlers still sucking on pacifiers, being carried and pushed in strollers at 3 years old?
—Weaver

So you want me to spit some snark at Tom and Katie over their parenting skills. Meh. I'd rather spit some snark at Madonna, just because she keeps doing stuff. But you asked, so I answer. The reason for all the kiddie holding, according to current and former Hollywood nannies, is much more innocent and sympathetic than you might think. In fact it's even a bit—gag—touching.

See if you can handle the treacly sweetness of the truth after the jump.

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Fame Pictures, Inc

I always see pictures of celebrity children in magazines, and they always seem to be happy. I mean, do these kids just not cry, or do magazines not print bad pictures of the child?
—Becca

Just for you, a photo of Maddox Jolie-Pitt, who pretty much looks like this in every pap shot. Onward, to more of your Burning Q's!

I hear they told Megan Fox to put on 10 pounds for Transformers 2. Can an actress really be toooo skinny?
—Dale, Waukegan, Ill.

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I was wondering how to become part of a Hollywood type's entourage?
—Brandon Wyatt, Northern Arizona

Sure, sure. Brad and Angie are bound to discover Arizona as their next home. Any day now. You just go ahead and wait until they chopper in, billion-dollar children in tow, seeking out a local just like you to, you know, hang out with. Maybe do a little mannying on the side.

Or you head straight to Los Angeles and get a job as some sort of celeb minion—lawyering, or fetching air lattes for Victoria Beckham. Because most of the time, a star's entourage is made up of paid lackeys

So who do you think rolls the deepest: Alicia Keys, Jessica Alba, Pete 'n' Ashlee or Janet Jackson? I've got info on each of their nightlife posses, but only if you follow me to the jump.

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AP Photo/Matt Sayles

How do celebs like Anne Hathaway or Marcia Cross stay so pale? I'd swear that they were vampires had I not seen pics of them frolicking in the sunshine.
—Jenny

Look more closely next time you spot Marcia Cross cavorting on the beach. You sure you don't see a few puffs of smoke, with maybe some accompanying sizzling noises?

And according to skin doctors to the stars, someone like her or Hathaway may have a certain skin type that simply hates the sun. "They just cannot tan," explains Beverly Hills dermatologist-to-the-stars Susan Evans. "They burn, but they don't tan."

They also use supergrade sun block—not necessarily expensive—that contains titanium or zinc.

Now, let's knock down some more of your Burning Q's!

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Jose Perez/INFphoto.com

What is the "it" or hot car for celebrities to have right now? Is it still cool to have the foreign sports cars, or are celebs going green and hybrid?
—T.M.

Hybrid? Sure, if you're talking about a hybrid that breeds expensive with super obnoxious.

Let's put it this way: When Beyoncé sang about another woman "in the 'Bach or the Rolls" for her single "Ring the Alarm," she happened to be talking about two cars owned by her then-boyfriend, Jay-Z. The rapper, now Beyoncé's lawfully wedded mogul, owns a Maybach and a Rolls-Royce Phantom. And both are the cars to have, dealers to the stars tell me. That is, if you're the type of star that can use "dukey rope" in a sentence.

Who else has managed to snag these $450,000 prestigemobiles? And what is inside those things, anyway? Find out—from Fiddy's car dealer, no less—after the jump.

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Arnold Turner/WireImage.com

Do most (if not all) celebrities think they are better than normal people?
—T. Lucas, Toledo, OH

Certainly not. Kanye West just likes to refer to himself as the new Kurt Cobain and "one of the more important people in pop culture" to see if you're listening. He really hates himself and thinks he's fat and wears those candy-colored polo shirts to punish himself.

Of course celebrities think they're better than everybody else. And before you decide that's just an opinion, I've got real proof. Read on.

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Dan Steinberg/AP Photo

There are always people around celebrities. How come there is not more dirt about how celebrities really act behind closed doors?
—Ed

Because most of the "dirt" witnessed by most assistants, bodyguards and other entourage members—drugs, the Gay—would trigger a libel suit if printed. Even if it were true. And the press just doesn't want the headache. Speaking of headaches, let's get this batch of your Burning Q's over with.

Who, among all American Idol alumni (not just winners), has sold the most albums?
—Pony

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